A heart-shaped cookie broken into pieces, symbolizing the impact of betrayal and the challenge of rebuilding trust.

Understanding the Mistrust/Abuse Schema

The ability to trust shapes how we connect, love, and feel safe in the world. But for some, trust doesn’t come easily. Instead, there’s a deep fear that others will let them down, take advantage, or cause harm. Even when kindness is shown, doubts creep in: What’s their real motive? When will they hurt me?

Two hands stretching towards each other but not touching, symbolizing emotional distance and the fear of abandonment.

The fear of abandonment can deeply affect how we interact with others and shape our relationships. For many, it often develops early in life and is shaped by experiences of inconsistency, emotional distance, or unexpected loss. These experiences leave a lasting imprint on how we perceive security and connection. As we grow, these early wounds